Tomorrow, Sunday May 13th is Mothers Day. Though it’s easy to see this day as a commercially exploited tradition (and maybe it is), it really has a deep meaning. Wikipedia defines Mother’s Day as: a celebration that honors mothers and motherhood, maternal bonds, and the influence of mothers in society. Now I’m not the perfect son, honoring his mom with a hand written letter elaborating on my love and appreciation for her. Nor will I overload her with flowers, cookies and presents. But, like the people in this film, I will definitely say to her: thank you mom! To make this film, the filmmaker went around New York City asking real people on the street to say thank you to their mothers and what he came back with are some terrific responses, some unexpected, some adorable, and as he put it: “(…) they all brought a huge smile to my face”. And it made me smile too.
‘Come play’ is a beautiful short that encourages us to perceive and explore life playfully. It shows you some words, sentences and images in a powerful combination, creating a serene and inspirational atmosphere. I realized once again that: ‘The words you use to give meaning to the things you see, is what you see. If you like this film, you’ll also like: ‘Wake Up. Day Calls You’, as seen in this post.
In order to improve the quality of your life, there are many things you might want to start doing. But as I wrote earlier, every start of something is the ending of something else. Start and stop, in a way, are the same thing. So in this post I’m gonna give you some ideas of things you may want to stop doing. Here we go: Stop spending time with the wrong people. Stop doing work that is not worth It. Stop running from your problems. Stop thinking you’re the only one with problems. Stop lying to yourself. Stop responding like a trained monkey. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. Stop taking no for an answer. Stop trying to be best at everything. Stop needing to be happy al the time. Stop being so serious all the time. Stop making things more complicated than they should be. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. Stop fearing/hiding your bad side. Stop being scared to make a mistake. Stop thinking you’re not ready. Stop stressing. Stop being jealous. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. Stop trying to make things perfect. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. Stop bullshitting yourself, stop thinking it’s all too late and go make a fresh start.
Watching this won’t have a relaxing effect on your mind, but then that’s precisely it’s aim. The film shows you in a striking way just how television screams for your devoted time and attention. Promising you to be your 24/7 loyal friend, providing you with everything you ‘need’ in life. As long as you don’t walk away from it, that is. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not against television at all. And of course it’s not just television that’s trying to get your attention. It’s also radio, computers, magazines, game consoles, smart phones and tablets etc.. We surround ourselves with devices that are all fighting over our time and attention by promising us… yeah, what exactly do they promise us? This film emphasizes the importance of making conscious choices when it comes to ‘media consumption’. To not get hypnotized, to remain independent, free thinking and… to go off line every now and then.
Search the web and you’ll find thousands of ‘rules’, ‘laws’, ‘lists’, ‘tips’ and ‘tricks’, ‘steps’ and ‘guides’, all elaborating on happiness and how to attain it. Why? Because more than anything else, happiness is what we’re after. Wikipedia says: ‘Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy’. So sure, who doesn’t want that? But nowadays, the pursuit of happiness in many parts of the world often drives people to unhappiness. Why? Because we tend to mistake having success for being happy: as long as we’re not successful, it’s hard – if not impossible – to feel happy. We’ve come to believe that to be happy, we need a reason. Like winning the lottery, chilling on a tropical beach, being madly in love etc.. We depend on external references like things, people, conditions and achievements to confirm our happiness. And although that’s understandable, the important question is: do we really? Do we really need a reason to be happy? The answer is: NO! Happiness is not reserved to those with a good reason. How could it, when a good reason for one person, means nothing to another? Happiness needs no cause. Everybody is free to be happy for whatever reason or no reason at all.
Can you imagine life without the concept of time? Sure, we wouldn’t have any deadlines to chase, but we would also lose the ‘good times’, wouldn’t we? Without time, ‘quality time’, ‘prime time’ and ‘big time’ would seize to exist. No more ‘running out of time’, being ‘ahead of our time’ or make it ‘in the nick of time’. We would no longer have ‘all the time in the world’, we couldn’t take a ‘time out’ or just ‘kill time’ if we wanted to. Wikipedia says: “Time is a part of the measuring system used to sequence events, to compare the durations of events and the intervals between them…”. We use time to organize life. Seconds, minutes and hours. Days, weeks and years. Past, present and future. Sooner, later, slow, fast etc.. But ultimately it’s our perception what gives time meaning. It’s by how we perceive time, that it starts working for us or against us. The film I show you here was made in Brooklyn NYC, within an 8 hours span. It takes you only 3 minutes to watch, yet it makes you feel as if time stands still. And that makes it a perfect example of how perception influences your experience of time. NOTE: This post is also published as a column in the Dutch Magazine for Coaching.
A “state of mind” is a temporary psychological state. It’s a mood, really. And moods make or break. They can make you feel invincible or powerless, happy or sad, outgoing or shy, focussed or vague. Darren L. Johnson said: “Ultimately, your state of mind determines your circumstances”. It means not the situation, but the mood you’re in determines how you manifest yourself. So, here are some quotes that might just boost your state of mind. Joyce Brothers: “Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success.” Napoleon Hill: “Fears are nothing more than a state of mind”. Robert Hillyer: “Perfectionism is a dangerous state of mind in an imperfect world”. Wayne Dyer: “The state of your life is nothing more than a reflection of your state of mind.” Catherine Ponder: “The forgiving state of mind is a magnetic power for attracting good.” Alexander Bell: “What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to quit until he finds it.” And back to Darren L. Johnson: To realize the outcomes you want, it is critical to recognize and experience the transition from your present thoughts, habits and actions to new thoughts, habits and actions. For it is this transition that lets you alter your state of mind, and thus change your world.
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